WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ
STORIES AND EXPERIENCES
WRITTEN IN INTIMATE FORM
Life sure has taught me many lessons over the years in regards to who deserves to hear me speak and who deserves my silence. Knowing when I am loved and sincerely appreciated. Accepting the things that I cannot change and trusting actions rather than words. When people show me who they are, I believe them. When my presence is longer valid and only tolerated due to who I know, what we have in common, or how I can benefit them, it's time for me to close the door. I tolerated so much for so long. But what hurt the most was thinking that someone was in my corner just to realize that they had already left way before I finally acknowledged it. Showing me my place and position taught me to move on, instead of holding on. That part is what I struggle with the most. Those that know me, know that I wear my heart on my sleeve. I try to see the good in everyone and constantly forgive those that honestly don't deserve a second more of my presence or time. With that said, you live and you learn. On a lighter note, I finally got to know myself and realized that in order for people to take me serious, I have to do the same for myself. It all starts with me. It felt so good to finally find peace in my life. I no longer feel what I once felt about myself. I no longer force myself to walk around in the darkness of doubt and distrust. The timing couldn't have been more perfect. For so long, I felt trapped in wanting to be loved and accepted by those that showed me who they were at the first hello and especially the last goodbye. The weight that I carried on my back definitely was a big relief once I let go of all the heavy baggage that was either holding me back or slowing me down. Just know that when the lights finally came on, I saw who was still standing with me and pushing me to be great in everything I did. The one's that no longer stayed around, are the one's that more than likely didn't want to be there in the first place. In conlusion to this, experience is the best teacher. Don't get held back trying to learn a lesson that has already been taught.
Written By: Dishayna Perkina
How many times have you texted him, just to turn around and delete everything you poured your heart into saying to get closure? He’s ignored you, sent your calls to voicemail, blocked you from his social media and stopped coming around, all out the blue. You’ve said a mouth full, touched on some sensitive subjects in your text and felt confident enough in sending it, at least you did at first. Once you’ve read everything you wrote all over for the 10th time, you hesitate, then delete because you don’t want him to take what you say out of context and much rather say it person. Then again, you convince yourself that you just may be jumping to conclusions and something could seriously be wrong, but you’re not sure at the moment because he hasn’t responded to you at all. So you wait! Of course, this has happened to many of us. But, there comes a time in a life when we just got be honest with ourselves and face the truth. You are not the first, and definitely not the last that this has happened too. One minute he’s spending quality time with you, planning you all’s future, telling you how much he enjoys your company and how he want’s spend the rest of his life with you, the next he’s gone MIA. Now you’re clueless as to what you could have said, or done wrong, leaving you feeling lost with anxiety and unanswered questions. You’ve called, text, messaged him on his social media, left voicemails and contemplated on whether or not to do a quick ride by well check, but then you chicken out, because you didn’t want to come off as being insecure or crazy. The suspense of possibilities has you wondering in the back of your mind, that there could be someone else, but you try to do everything possible to block that thought of deceit out. You’re Facebook notifications just alerted you of new updates and post. Now you’re wondering why he’s posted up on his social media, replying to other’s comments, but when you try to comment, it’s not allowed. Your thoughts and feeling are all over the place and it’s gotten to the point to where you can’t eat, sleep, or think of anything else but him and why he hasn’t communicated with you. Weeks go by and now you’re convinced that he’s not interested in being with you anymore, so you slowly start coming back around to your old self. You finally stopped feeling like you need to be with him and changed your status from complicated to single. It’s funny how those tables turn and suddenly from out of nowhere, you get a text saying, “What’s up stranger”? Your heartrate speeds up, your anxiety kicks in and you want to reply so bad, as a sense of relief comes over you now knowing that he’s okay. Although you held off as long as you could, you really want to hear his voice and an explanation. Anticipating the wait, you found yourself reading his text and listening to his voicemails over and over, then boom, you reply back to his text saying, “CALL ME” and he doesn’t respond after. Wow, you just fell for his disappearing acts once again, but this time, you’ve had enough of his BS. A few days later, you post a few selfies on your Instagram and Facebook, the comments and likes start rolling in. All of sudden, you get a DM from you know who. This time you ignore him like he ignored you. You want to move forward, leave the past in the past and be happy. You deserve happiness right? Because you didn’t respond, he repeatedly texts you, calls, messages you on social media, leaves you voicemails and actually stops by your house without an invite. Now that’s crazy! Those tables sure do turn quick when you give back what they put out. It’s not your fault that he fail to be honest with you from the jump and disregarded your feelings. It’s obvious he got comfortable with you allowing him to pop in and out of your life whenever he pleased. Now he’s worried about you, what you doing, who you with, why he’s blocked from your social media, why his calls keep going to voicemail and why you’re not responded to him through text, since he’s finally decided to reach out to you. Fella’s, let’s be honest and fair with one another. “WE” (women) get tired of being that good, solid and loyal woman that’s suppose to wait for you to change, do things on your time, accept the things that you would never accept if we did it, continue to ride for you, until we realize that we’ve been riding for ourselves, the whole time. Now I’m not speaking for everyone, so let’s make that clear. But a lot of what I stated, many can relate. I can honestly say that I’ve experienced this in my past and let’s just say, lesson learned! The more I asked him why he continued to hurt me, I begin to realize that I was actually hurting myself by allowing him to keep coming back. This behavior became the norm for us and the more he distance himself from me, I no longer questioned him, there was no need to argue about the truth. My silence spoke volumes to him. I gave him exactly what he gave me. Peace! While he was busy doing him and living his best life. I was making plans without him and preparing myself for my future. Time reveals all and when it all finally hit the fan, I was out! There was no coming back to what he had no desire in keeping in the first place. He was comfortable with the old me, but I no longer lived there anymore. So you see, l had to go through what I went through, to realize my worth and find my true self. He had to sit still and realize that he lost a dime, while chasing pennies in the streets. But of course, his story will be different with a plot twist, because that’s just how the story goes, but my truth still remains the same. No love lost on my end and I hope he understands, but when a woman’s fed, “it aint nothing you can do about it”.
A Woman's Worth
You are fearfully and wonderfully made by God. Know that you are priceless and that no man can buy you. You will never lower your standards. Your standards are set to remind you, that you will not settle for less. People respect what they have to work for and what they love.
You are Worthy.
A Woman's Worth
To me, a woman's worth is more then what she thinks she deserves in a relationship. How much she values herself? Do you value yourself enough to let go of the things that you know is not worthy of your love, time, money, and peace of mind. When a woman knows her worth she has the courage and the confidence to be herself. No matter what people think, she know's what is best for her.
A woman’s worth is immeasurable and very often unappreciated. Women have the same strength as men. As women, we carry everyone’s weight and stresses on our shoulders, while trying to figure out how to deal with her own issues. There are so many requirements for a woman, she tends to lose herself. The majority of the time, she and her pa
A woman’s worth is immeasurable and very often unappreciated. Women have the same strength as men. As women, we carry everyone’s weight and stresses on our shoulders, while trying to figure out how to deal with her own issues. There are so many requirements for a woman, she tends to lose herself. The majority of the time, she and her partner, if she has one, forgets she’s a woman first and how important she is.
A woman's worth is priceless. She carries something with her that cannot be compared to gold. Nothing in this world is more precious, for she creates life. We were made for men, without a woman life wouldn't exist. So ladies, let's not be hard on ourselves, love us the way we are, don't take less than 100%. Someone is going to treasure you and trust me it feels good.
A woman’s worth is priceless. She can hold so many titles play so many roles and still make time for herself. She can extend love to so many countless individuals and still not know her worth. A woman is the glue that holds many things together, she is the finishing touch of life. A woman is powerful and truly a blessing from GOD.
Brandy Stafford Wright
A woman's worth is incomparable because of the unlimited strength she has within. Let your strength and confidence shine bright in spite of others opinions. Love yourselves and be that confident woman. If you believe you are a queen, show it. Others will respect it.
I deserve someone who loves God more than anything and puts him first. Someone who will love my kids as their own. Someone who will love and respect me as a woman (come to the door to pick me up for a date, opens the door for me, etc.). Someone who is honest. Someone who treats me beyond I could ever imagine.
A woman’s worth is so much more than words could ever define. She is the key existence to humankind and her worth is ever so priceless. She is a life giver. Her existence is the true meaning of life itself. She is and will always be QUEEN!
A woman’s worth is her value (not monetary). It’s how she sees herself and not how others see her. She exudes beauty, grace, confidence, and intelligence. She knows she’s more than just her body. The vision she has for herself cannot be deterred. We are powerful, deserving and worthy.
One day, you will stop worrying about where he’s going, where he is, who he’s with and where he’s been. You will stop convincing yourself that the relationship is worth fighting for and why it’s best to not keep accepting all the excuses he gives, because you already know the truth. If he showed you once, he’s definitely going to show you again. Even though your intuition has guided you to see the person that he really is, truth be told, you stayed for all the wrong reasons. Yes, I said it! Now I can’t speak for every women, but many of us women have been there, including myself. We’ve tolerated so much, maybe more than we should have. But, one things for sure, at any given moment, we all reach that breaking point. Now don’t get me wrong, I know it’s easier said than done. I get it! You’ve built so much together and hate to see it all go down the drain. But remember this, don’t take the blame for something that you didn’t do. Everything is not your fault and possibly none of it is! You did your part, you held it down, you took care of business, you loved so hard, until you had nothing more to give. You stayed, you prayed and then you had enough. Let’s be real, sometimes we stay in unhealthy relationships due to the fear of being alone and not wanting to start over. You may have kids together, fear being chosen over, or feel undesirable by them loving or spending time with someone else. Oh and let’s not forget about them starting a whole new life family outside of the one he has with you, leaving you with all the bills and other responsibilities. The list goes on, but it is what it is. Once you’ve reach that vulnerable state and allow yourself to become disconnected to what’s really going on, things can become even more complicated. Sometimes, being physically, intimately, mentally and emotionally tied to someone can make matters worse than what we could have ever imagined. The people around us expresses what they see; the hair loss, the weight loss, the sadness in our face and let’s not leave out how distant and mute you’ve become. Fast forward, back to reality! Ignoring all the warning signs and red flags, can definitely cost you your peace of mind. His manipulation and fake apologies will no longer be accepted. His scripted future plans no longer exist, because he’s never acted on them anyway. Are you woke yet! You’re tired and want to be loved like you deserve to be loved. You want to be touched without a schedule. You want to be happy and taken seriously. You want to be noticed and not ignored. You want to feel protected. You deserve a commitment of loyalty and respect. Forget about the lies, excuses and deceit. One day, you will finally get tired of working so hard to keep him and say enough is enough, I’m done living this lie. I thought he was for me, but he was meant for someone else, clearly. I’m throwing in the towel, no more tears or fears. This is it, I deserve better and I intend to do better. It’s time that I stop discounting myself just because he doesn’t see my value and true worth. No more worries! It’s time to love me more than I ever have and move on. So, with all that being said, today is my new beginning, cheers to future!